THE VALLEY WHERE I WAS CARRIED: A Widow's Journey

THE VALLEY WHERE I WAS CARRIED: A Widow's Journey

If you are holding this journal, your heart has known loss. Maybe recently, maybe years ago. Maybe the pain still feels raw, or it has settled into quieter places where it still catches you off guard. However it lives in you, I want you to know this from the very beginning: you are not weak for grieving. When I first lost my husband, Keith, I felt like the world kept spinning while I stood still. Everyone else seemed to move forward, returning to work, posting holiday photos, and laughing in grocery store aisles, while I was learning how to breathe in a life I didn’t recognize. People told me I was strong, but I didn’t feel strong. I felt broken, exhausted, and unsure how to live without the person who had been my anchor, my encourager, and my safe place. Perhaps you’ve felt that too. Grief can be isolating. It can make you feel like no one truly understands the depth of what you lost, not just the person, but the future you imagined, the rhythms of daily life, the shared looks across the room, the comfort of knowing someone was always there. It isn’t just the big milestones that hurt; it’s the little moments, the quiet mornings, the empty chair, and the inside jokes that live only in the silent spaces of your heart. In those places, I learned something important: grief is not something you “get over.” It is something you learn to live with and God walks with you as you do. This journal was born from my own journey through the valley. Over time, I began writing down my memories, my fears, my prayers, and the ways God met me. I didn’t write because I was strong. I wrote because I was desperate to make sense of the pain while still holding on to hope. I wrote to remember Keith. I wrote to remind myself that I was still here for a reason. Slowly, I felt God inviting me to share what I had learned, not because I had “arrived,” but because I knew what it felt like to be where you are. Each chapter begins with a personal story from my own life, real moments of grief, struggle, faith, and unexpected joy. After the story, you’ll find scripture, prayer, journal prompts, and more. These are not rules or assignments. They are invitations . Take what helps. Leave what doesn’t. There is no right or wrong way to move through this journal just like there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Some days you may flip ahead with ease. Other days you may sit with one sentence for a week and that is okay. This space is for you and God to meet in the most honest way possible. Wherever you are in this journey, I want you to know something I had to learn slowly and painfully: There is still life ahead of you. Not the same life. Not the life you planned. But a life where joy and sorrow can coexist, where God still has purpose for you and where love continues in new and beautiful ways. You will never “move on” from the person you love but you can move forward with them woven into who you are. Their love is not gone. It now lives within you. This is not only my story, it's yours too. In this book you are invited to write your story right alongside mine with guided prompts to help you unlock the feelings held in the fragile spaces of your heart. My prayer is that as you write, read, rest, cry, breathe, and reflect, you will feel the gentle comfort of the One who promises to be close to the brokenhearted. I pray you will sense His presence beside you in the valley. I pray you will rediscover your strength, your voice, your identity, and your hope, one step at a time. And when you cannot take a step, may you remember this: God will carry you. You are not alone. You are seen. You are deeply loved. This is not the end of your story. This is the sacred middle where God is still writing. Welcome, dear friend. Let’s breathe together. Let’s heal gently. Let’s begin.