The 2026 Demotivational Wall Calendar (A funny, uninspirational, and humorous 12"x24" (open) monthly calendar. Makes a great gag gift/white elephant

The 2026 Demotivational Wall Calendar (A funny, uninspirational, and humorous 12"x24" (open) monthly calendar. Makes a great gag gift/white elephant

ON SALE! (Normally $15.95) - Are you tired of motivational messages telling you to strive for more? Why not lean into the beauty of doing less with The 2026 Demotivational Wall Calendar! ORIGINAL, HUMOROUS QUOTES - Find fresh excuses to put off responsibilities, ignore deadlines, and avoid your family. OBSCURE HOLIDAYS: Public Sleeping Day, Ditch New Year's Resolutions Day, and many more. GORGEOUS PHOTOS: You can sit and stare at them for hours, wishing you were somewhere else. DISCLAIMER: You agree to hold Collier Publishing LLC harmless for lost jobs, estranged family members, or sudden, alarming weight gain. GENEROUS SIZE & PREMIUM QUALITY: Produced by a small publisher in Evergreen, Colorado. Measures 12"x12" (12"x24" open), making it significantly larger than most competing calendars. Printed on thick, responsibly-sourced paper with a varnish to prevent writing from showing through to the next month. Perfect for home, office, or anywhere hope goes to die! Sample Quotes: REACH FOR THE STARS - If you succeed, you’ll be incinerated by a nuclear inferno. If you fail, you’ll be lost in the dark, cold void of space. Either way, it will be one less obnoxious overachiever to deal with. HEALTH - 4 out of 5 doctors agree that if you take health advice from the pages of a cheap calendar, you probably won’t live all that long. WONDER - Twinkle, twinkle little star, someone once wondered what you are. But now we know from physics class, that you’re just a ball of gas. All wonder is now gone, and we have nothing to wish upon. Are you tired of motivational messages telling you to strive for more? Why not lean into the beauty of doing less with The 2026 Demotivational Wall Calendar! Packed with hilariously uninspiring, original quotes, this calendar will help you find fresh excuses to put off responsibilities, ignore deadlines, and avoid spending quality time with your family. You'll also discover obscure holidays that will reinforce your torpor, like Public Sleeping Day and Ditch New Year's Resolutions Day. The gorgeous photos will demotivate you even more, as you can sit and stare at them for hours, wishing you were somewhere else.

*By purchasing this calendar, you agree to hold Collier Publishing LLC and its employees harmless should you lose your job, receive divorce papers from your spouse, become estranged from your children, or gain an ungodly amount of weight.

This calendar is produced by a small publisher in Evergreen, Colorado. It is printed on thick, environmentally-friendly paper, with a varnish to prevent writing from showing through to the next month.