Once and Again: A Novel

Once and Again: A Novel

New York Times bestselling author Rebecca Serle, the author behind “heartbreaking, redemptive, and authentic” (Jamie Ford, New York Times bestselling author) modern classic In Five Years , returns with an unforgettable tale of a family of women with an astonishing gift: the ability to redo one moment in their lives. The women of the Novak family were each born with a gift: they can, just once, turn back time. Lauren has known since she was fifteen that her mother Marcella saved Lauren’s father from a deadly car accident. Dave is alive and happy, and out on the Malibu waves. But ever since, Marcella, her power spent, has lived in fear of what she won’t be able to reverse. Her own mother, Sylvia, is her polar opposite: a free-spirited iconoclast with a glamorous past she only hints at. Lauren has spent her life between these two role models—and waiting for her own catastrophe to strike. Then one summer, Lauren’s husband takes a job in New York and she moves back to Broad Beach Road, back into her childhood home on the shores of Malibu. Lauren looks forward to surfing with her dad again and perhaps repairing an unspoken fracture in her relationship with her mother. What she doesn’t expect is for the boy next to door to return home as well: Stone, Lauren’s first love, who broke her heart nearly a decade before. As Lauren falls into familiar patterns, with her family and, more dangerously, Stone, she finds herself thinking about all the choices, large and small, that have brought her to this moment. And wondering, finally, if one of them should be undone. Outstanding Praise for Rebecca Serle “A maestro of love in all its forms.” – Gabrielle Zevin, New York Times bestselling author of Tomorrow & Tomorrow & Tomorrow "Serle is the queen of big feelings and impossible dilemmas." — Bustle "Serle’s ability to ask questions about the truths behind our relationships and decisions is unparalleled." — Booklist "Brilliant, original, and sure to leave you shoving a copy into someone’s hands." —Jodi Picoult, #1 New York Times bestselling author “[A] poignant reflection on the price of a person’s decisions, and how far someone will go to save the ones they love…Deeply and surprisingly moving.” —Kirkus “A romantic gem. Grabs you on page one and never lets go.” — Laura Dave, on Expiration Dates “Heartbreaking, redemptive, and authentic.” —Jamie Ford, New York Times bestselling author, on In Five Years “Serle is known for her powerful stories that tug at the heartstrings.” – Woman’s World “As clever as it is moving, the rare read-in-one-sitting novel you won’t forget.” — Chloe Benjamin, New York Times bestselling author of The Immortalists , on In Five Years Rebecca Serle is the New York Times bestselling author of Once and Again , Expiration Dates , One Italian Summer , In Five Years , The Dinner List , and the young adult novels The Edge of Falling and When You Were Mine . Serle also developed the hit TV adaptation Famous in Love , based on her YA series of the same name . She is a graduate of USC and The New School and lives in Los Angeles with her husband and daughter. Find out more at RebeccaSerle.com. Chapter One CHAPTER ONE I landed , he texts me, and I feel the ground underneath my feet once again. It’s 4:00 a.m. in Los Angeles, both too late and too early, but in the four years we’ve been together—three of them married—I’ve never been able to sleep while Leo is in the air. For the past hour I’ve been standing in our dark kitchen, refreshing the screen of my cell phone and bathing the room in harsh blue light. Exhale. I pull my robe more tightly around me. I love this bungalow—built in 1958, updated in 2010; it’s charming and bright. Big windows, a sliver of a garden, walking distance to Melrose Place. But there’s no functional heat. When I first moved in, six and a half years ago, the walls were green and burnt orange and the light fixtures were all brass, but over time I painted the walls white, wallpapered the bathroom, regrouted the kitchen, and decorated the space with a colorful mix of Rose Bowl Flea Market finds and Crate & Barrel sales. It’s charming, and organized. Despite Leo’s piles of things, I am not someone who finds clutter to be cheerful. Go back to bed, Lauren , he writes, and I smile. I love you. I feel my shoulders slacken. The whirling in my stomach settles to a casual rinse cycle. He’s fine. When I was fifteen years old, my father died in a car crash. He was driving down Mulholland in the middle of a Tuesday afternoon, slightly before rush hour. He was not speeding. A teen driver in the oncoming lane was on his cell phone. Both drivers died on impact. I flip on the electric kettle and scoop some dark roast into the pot before my eye settles on the mail stacked on our counter. Leo forgot to go through it before he left. I fan out the letters. Insurance forms for Leo, some Ralphs coupons, and a thank-you note from my f